Adoration

He managed to hold the plastic beaker against the wall, with great difficulty.

Then, with a much greater degree of effort, he snuggled his ear up to the base of it, and listened. None of these complex manoeuvres were easy for a rat. His wife looked on. She knew that he did stuff in this part of the wall cavity with the Greek yogurt container he dragged in one day, but had never fully realised why. This time she had watched the strange performance carefully. She looked on in silence.

“They’re at it again,” he whispered.

She went to speak, but he squinted disapproval.

“I just need to be sure,” he murmured, readjusting the position of his ear and closing his eyes.

“Wow! Here they go! They’re hard at it now, going hammer and tong they are. I’ve often wondered where these humans get all this anger from. I mean, they’ve got it made, haven’t they? Life’s a doddle for these folk, yet they carry on like this.” He turned his head and let the cup fall. “Just had to be sure, sometimes it’s the telly.”

She shrugged. “Telly?”

“Yep. These guys have TV programs where the humans watch other humans shout at each other… on the telly. It’s part of what they call entertainment.”

She bristled. “How do you know all this stuff?”

He grinned. “I get around.”

She looked suspicious. “OK. You get around, but this… this pantomime with the yogurt pot; what’s that all about?”

“Quite simple, my dear. When these guys get into a blazing row like this, it only means one thing.”

Her nose twitched. “And that is?”

“Food!”

“Food?”

“Yes, and plenty of it.”

Her cute little shiny eyes grew wider.

“It has been my observation,” he went on, “that she does the cooking and he washes up afterwards.” He grinned again, adding, “Usually.”

“Usually?”

“Yes, but not on these occasions. When they have a right old ding dong like this he does a bit of washing up, but not much. He likes to leave a real mess for her in the morning.”

She was shaking her head and frowning.

He went on. “Of course, in amongst all this mess… food scraps. Last time they carried on like this I brought back all that grated cheese and tomato pips. Remember?”

“Of course I do. It was a real feast. I seem to remember that it lasted us several days.”

“Yes, well, from what I’ve heard here tonight, we’re in for a giant haul.”

Tiny pink fists wiped at her teary eyes. Her tail flipped back and forth a couple of times. Her head fell to one side and she whispered, “What a guy!”

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