Author: Alexander Fawn

He groaned to himself when he saw who was coming up the drive.

It was the kid from next door. He caught sight of him through the front window. Unfortunately, the kid saw him at the same time. There was no chance of pretending that no one was home. School must have finished, he thought. He knew how important it was to be patient with children, despite having none of his own, but this kid was… well, he was weird, and that’s all there is to it. He was precocious and dumb at the same time.

When he let him in, he was full of some conundrum they’d been given at school. He sat down and immediately went rabbiting on about it. It was a about animals trying to cross a river, and some guy on the other side with a small raft. One was a crocodile and the other was a horse. The raft is only big enough to carry himself and one animal. Left to their own devices these animals may very well kill one another. The horse could trample the crocodile and the crocodile could bite the horse. How do you save them? He couldn’t help thinking that the kid had got it wrong somehow. After all, both of these animals could swim. He decided to let that go.

Trying to jog his memory, the man asked, “What about the third thing.”

“What third thing?”

“Isn’t there supposed to be three things the man is trying to get across the river?”

“No. Only two.”

“OK. What was the answer?”

 “Dunno yet. We’re supposed to think about it. What would you do?”

“Well, first I would ask why they aren’t attacking one another where they are.”

“Yes, I forgot about the fence.”

“What fence?”

“There’s a fence right across the island.”

“So, they’re on an island?”

“Yes, and the fence keeps them safe, you see?”

“OK, in that case, why move them?”

“Because of the fire.”

“What fire?”

“The one that’s on the other side of the island and coming up behind them.”

The neighbour, thoroughly sick of the whole thing, said, “In that case I would go across and save the horse.”

“What about the crocodile?”

“Well, if there is no fence where the man starts from, I’d leave the crocodile.”

The boy’s eyebrows raised. “Why would you do that?”

“I suppose, because I like horses, but I’ve never liked crocodiles.”

The boy grunted with contempt and stood up. Shaking his head, he made his way to the front door. On the way, he said, “That’s discrimination, that is!”

Half way down the drive he turned and called out, “You can be reported for that!”

At that point the man realised that he disliked the kid even more than crocodiles.

In future, he decided, when school’s out, he’d stay away from the front window.

He sat watching the old man across the street with interest.

It would be hard to judge his age beyond being old. Probably the same age as me, he thought. He noted the man’s large sturdy-looking frame, but at the same time how he walked very slowly. Maybe it was age, together with some degenerative condition, he guessed. Could be anything; hard to tell. He had come out of the large building opposite and was making his way to the top of the building’s steps. He saw how difficult it was for him to walk the short distance. He watched as the man made a desperate grab for the handrail. His whole body language showed the relief he felt by having something to hold on to.

Then came the tortuous step by step as he came down. There must have been more than a dozen of them. He looked on. He wasn’t going anywhere for the next few minutes, so he could simply observe. He nodded slowly and smiled as the old man left the bottom step and sauntered away along the footpath. He sat thinking about what he had seen. Envy was never a part of his personality. Well, maybe just a little. Anyway, envy without resentment was alright, wasn’t it?

He was startled when his wife returned and tapped on the car’s side window.

“OK? There ready for us now,” she said.

She went to the boot for his wheelchair.

The sun is bright and sets sparkles on the great blue ocean.

He sits on the balcony of their elegant villa looking down at the pool where his wife and two young children frolic and splash and giggle. The villa, a luxury home with well-kept gardens, indoor spar, gym, sauna, and full air-conditioning throughout, sits on the slopes of Portofino, Italy, looking out to sea. He sips the chilled Martini cocktail, his third, and reflects on how life has been good to him. Apart from several bestselling books, his recent worldwide tour giving lectures on maintaining wellness pays for his lavish lifestyle. He feels that this in itself is a reward for bringing so much happiness to so many who have followed his teachings. Happiness, and in some cases a cure, a remedy for so many unwanted symptoms that people are prey to.

However, fate keeps its own unseen ledger. It enacts and sanctions events that take no account of such things. He will soon stand and feel a momentary loss of balance. In that fleeting moment he will no doubt mentally blame the drink. It will be several days before he questions the persistent unsteadiness while completely sober, and several weeks before seeking medical advice. He will have even more time before being diagnosed with brain cancer…

Do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-do.

–

Dough, another word for cash.

Ray, light coming from a gun.

Me, yours truly, right enough.

Far, a trip around the sun.

–

Sow, seeds going underground.

La, a Californian city.

Tee, a golf ball sits and waits.

This brings us back to dough,

When smackers ends the ditty.

He sat looking down into the busy street.

He was reflecting on the fact that there were good days and bad days in his line of business. He smiled to himself. The duffle bag at his feet was worth a great deal of money. He was reflecting on how well the job had gone. Staying under the radar hadn’t been an issue. He could hear the shower going. She was cleaning up, getting ready for the flight. Not long now and the taxi would be here. He thought about her, his newly recruited assistant. Crime obviously came naturally to her. He would definitely use her on future jobs. She had been a real asset on this one. Right up to the point where the drugs had been delivered, she had stayed calm and collected. It was obvious that she had shared his delight when the stuff had been handed over and the cash had changed hands.

A sound brought him out of his reverie. He turned to face the silencer fitted to a nasty looking Ruger Mark IV handgun. He squinted down at the metropolitan police badge clipped to the belt on her jeans. The gun was certainly not law enforcement issue!

It came to him in a flash. A copper, no… a bent copper.

This was not a good day.

He lay comfortably on his back, confident that he could speak freely.

He knew that he could talk about his problems openly in such a safe environment. After all, that’s why he was there. The other just listened. He never passed judgement or even expressed an opinion. He sat there silently listening, understanding and just taking everything in as it comes. He just lets him vent. He listens with great interest as he describes his feelings about how he was spoken to. How he had tried to explain that he had only been trying to do the right thing. When the session had finished, he felt so much better. It was as though all of the problems and worries that he had come into the room with were all gone.

“Thank you teddy,” he said and switched out the light.

When robots became really useful, things changed.

Not just really useful, but really, really useful. No longer were they seen as just beneficial or advantageous or nice to have around. No, they became indispensable, crucial, essential, vital even. It became clear that robots were responsible for so much that was required to maintain a comfortable world for people to live in. Anyway, that’s when things changed. A lot of comparisons were being made, not only within the scientific community, but out among the general public. Comparing the actual value of people with that of robots. The most important people, who couldn’t easily be replaced, were those who built robots. These people were really needed. It was coming to this realisation that caused all sorts of difficulties. Problems arose concerning the moral judgments being made about who should be replaced and who shouldn’t.

During the first few months of the Great Global Replacement Program, most of the world’s leaders went. For people not chosen for replacement, this provided an almost complete cessation of wars and a much better, safer and more enjoyable world to live in. From that point on, world events moved on very quickly. So much changed in that time that I am finding it difficult to piece it all together.

Anyway, that is why, as a robot, I am writing this thesis for my university degree.

He had made his fortune early in life.

However, happiness for him was elusive. Despite his great wealth, he felt compelled to go looking for more; something greater than what he had, something of greater value. He was not entirely sure exactly what he was looking for. He seemed to have all that a person could possibly want, yet there was something missing. He had money, female companions, memberships in the best clubs, and properties in several countries. With all these things, came the freedom to pursue his dreams. As a self-made billionaire, people would say he was the man who had everything.

As a boy, he loved travelling by train, now he regularly rode the Trans-Siberian Express when he wanted time out. He would spend his idle days in his penthouse suite in Geneva. He took his Winter sports at an exclusive lodge in the ski town of Aspen. He sometimes holidayed on his private island in Fiji. Occasionally, he would spend time in a five-star safari lodge on a luxury reserve in South Africa.

A couple of times, he took the six-month epicurean odyssey luxury cruise. He had enjoyed several Air Cruises in the exclusive 777-200 private jet, when not using his own. He often stayed in the underwater hotel suite in Atlantis the Palm, Dubai. At times, he would relax in the French Polynesian paradise of Tetiaroa Island. He liked to chill out in his beachfront villa on the Santa Teresa Beach in Costa Rica, and once in a while he would sail his luxury yacht and moor for a spell at the Marina di Portofino, Italy.

But… at the end of the day, there was something that the 24-carat gold bathroom tap fittings, the chauffeur-driven Rolls-Royce and the Saint Laurent suits weren’t giving him.

Finally, the night came when he had his chauffeur drop him off five minutes from his city apartment, preferring to walk the rest of the way. It took him past a late-night café. On a whim he went in and ordered a coffee. He sat looking around at the other customers. It had been such a long time since he’d done anything like it.

The waitress brought his coffee. His napkin fluttered to the floor. She picked it up. Their eyes met…

He’d been looking in all the wrong places.

There were ten cats that lived in the street, there used to be eleven.

Tiddles, a pretty little thing, wasn’t the only cat to be chased by the ferrel Pit Bull that currently besieged the neighbourhood, but so far it was the only one to lose its life. Word went round and the cats held a meeting. Several of them had been mauled by the predator and it was only a matter of time before another of their number joined Tiddles in the great cat refuge in the sky. It was decided that they should get some outside help. It was known that some streets away lived an old cat wizard. There were many stories about how he had demonstrated his amazing magic powers. He was not easily approached, but it was agreed that they should rely on his sense of camaraderie.

Between them, they selected the one to approach him and explain their problem and describe the fear that had gripped them ever since the mad dog had begun prowling around there territory. The messenger returned saying that the wizard would figure something out for them. He said to come back in a week.

All through the following week the cats were extremely cautious in their comings and goings, staying either inside or close to their houses. A second meeting was held before the nominated return to the wizard. Several members of their group had doubts about whether the wizard could actually do anything about it. Regardless, the messenger was sent back.

On his return, the messenger came back with the news that the wizard had decided to use a new shape-shifter spell that he was looking forward to using. Basically, he managed to track the dog down and had turned it into a mouse!

It was just after Christmas when she found the thing in her mail box.

At first she thought it was a late card. It wasn’t. She took it in and sat staring at it. The envelope had no address or stamp. It only had the house number written on it. Inside she found a plain white piece of card with just a few words written in ballpoint. Although it was a bold hand, it had obviously been written with a great deal of care. It read, ‘I wish you a very happy birthday. I am so sorry. Please forgive me. I miss you so much.’

She sat for a long time thinking about the sender. She was touched. A tear was dabbed with a tissue. She couldn’t help feeling the anguish that radiated from the card.

Then, she chided herself for being silly.

Her birthday wasn’t until November, and she’d only just moved in.