She felt that things were changing, or maybe about to change.
On the short walk to the café for her morning starter, the sense of something unseeable was gnawing away at her. It was hard to describe the feeling, even to herself. Maybe it was just the way her landlord looked at her… again. Or the girls in the despatch office, with their nasty little minds. Of course, the fact that her boyfriend came home very late again didn’t help. She could have done a lot better for herself in that department. As she rounded the corner, the coffee shop came into sight. There was that feeling again, growing stronger. Would she order the same old latte again? She went in feeling strangely nervous.
It was busy, as always. The three people in front of her gave her a chance to check out the list of drinks on offer. She stood in a daze, reading the board. She thought, it’s all about change, isn’t it? She spent so long thinking about this that the queue had gone and the guy leaning on the counter next to the machine said, “Hello.”
She snapped out of it. “Yes, sorry, can I get a long macchiato please… to go.”
The barista just nodded.
“Eh! I get two shots in that, right?”
He gave a small smile. “Sure do.”
To go, she thought. I just ordered coffee to go. I don’t do that. I sit by the window keeping track of time, looking out at the people gathering at the bus stop, waiting for the same bus I catch. She became aware of the man saying something.
“Sorry?”
He smiled again, bigger this time. He was holding a takeaway cup and felt-tip pen. “I said, name.”
“Oh! Sorry. Ethel.”
The man shook his head, looking over at a distant table. “No, we have one of them; middle name?”
“I… I don’t have one.”
He almost giggled. “Never mind, anything’ll do.”
She thought hard for a moment. “Autumn. Yes, Autumn will do.”
He wrote and she waited.
After standing by the door thinking about her new name for a while, she heard it called out. She left the shop, crossed the road and made straight for the ATM.
It was as though she was running on automatic. She couldn’t remember ever taking out this amount of cash. She only just managed to catch her regular bus. After a few minutes the bus pulled up at her stop. She didn’t move.
Autumn would never look back.